Color Me Cryptic

I was watching the news the other night when Jon Stewert* played a clip of outgoing Secretary of Scariness Tom Ridge talking about the months of planning that went into our famously ridiculed color-coded terrorist warning system. Now, I could go on a bit about how cynically politicized the rainbow chart is and has been since its days on the drawing board (seriously), but luckily for you The Onion has come up with a more amusing direction for this post.

If Sec. Ridge and friends worked months on our five-color system, imagine what his Iraqi counterpart must have gone through coming up with this Iraqi homeland security advisory system!

And while we have fun laughing at the parody of reality we call our lives, let's remember that 270 or so more of our neighbors are off to Iraq soon. That family-devastating news appeared in this weekend's ProJo, right above another story about November being the deadliest of months since we won the war last year. I can't believe this show's even still on, they say there are new episodes but they all seem like repeats. I'm bored with it, really. Who's winning the Amazing Race?

* I think I am going to ride the idea of the D-Show actually being the news as far as she'll go. It's still better than a certain red stater I know who considers Talk Soup on E! the "news". I kid you not.