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By the time you read this, the Devil Rays and Yankasses will have officially inaugerated the 2004 baseball season. First pitch: 5:16am eastern standard time. Why so early? The game is in Japan. The rest of the teams won't get started in games that count until this Sunday, but I've decided that it's very important that I catch the absolute beginning of the Season to Top All Others®. Plus I drank a late cup of coffee and I can't sleep, so a 4am local start time isn't really affecting me. The first pitch of the 2004 season... a strike to Derek Jeter! If that's not a good omen for Sox fans, I don't know what is. Of course, Hideki Matsui, Japanes hero, slaps a double, obviously using his Japanese powers strengthened by home soil. A-Rod's first appearance in pinstripes ends in style: he strikes out. Obviously thinking about Jeter too much. 'Roid Rage Giambi comes up and of course hits a home run, which just proves that he should eat some bad sushi. I'm not going to do play by play, since a 2-0 lead for Mike Mussina against the Devil Rays doesn't sound too promising. I do want to mention that local phenom Rocco Baldelli (who Em and I are convinced will someday play for the Yankees) is a major hit over in Japan. It's unfathomable to me that a kid who used to play high school baseball against my classmates is a freakin' rock star in Tampa (and, apparently, the Far East). He strikes out in his first at bat. That one's for you, Em. Oh, what do you know, Rudy Guliani is there. I don't see Billy Crystal... yet. Any bets on whether Ben Affleck shows up in Baltimore this Sunday? Anyway, the This-is-the-Year Red Sox World Championship Season (vol. 86 and counting) is underway, and I couldn't be happier. Well, a Yankee loss would make me pretty happy... Play Ball!